


Wrapped Up

by butterfly23



Category: Jessie J (Musician)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-08
Updated: 2020-06-08
Packaged: 2021-03-03 23:08:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,525
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24613549
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/butterfly23/pseuds/butterfly23





	Wrapped Up

The room I was staying in was big. I mean, it was bigger than I would ever ask for. Rose explained that we would go out shopping and soon make a list of all that I would need. I kind of felt bad for them spending so much money on me, but I guess I would have to grow used to it. 

I had met the majority of the immediate family. Rose and Stephen's two out of three daughters, Hannah and Rachel. I guess they were kind of like my sisters now. I had met both their husbands and their children briefly, the happiness in the family apparent. There was just one more person to meet. I would have met her with the other two before I moved, but believe it or not, she was halfway across the world on tour. I had been adopted by Jessie J's parents. Okay, that wasn't something any kid could say. 

The other two women I met had their own lives, and from the time I had spent with them, I knew that they would make me feel at home. They just kind of had that feeling around them, and I assumed that it was because they had kids. Another thing which I noticed within this family was that they are honest. I was always asked if I was okay and reassured that I could talk to them whatever time of day it was. I liked that. 

"Dad!" I heard from the kitchen, the front door letting in a bitter breeze before closing again. 

The excited talk between the two filled the hallway, and I would be lying if I said I wasn't nervous. I was worried about meeting new people full stop. Briefly after, Stephen came into the kitchen with a smile on his face. That's another thing, they weren't afraid to show their emotions. I don't know how I would get on with that. Behind the family-man was a well-dressed, tall skinny woman. When I say well dressed, I mean fancy. Fancy as in nice black jeans and a top which looked too expensive. Let's forget about the jacket.

"Jessie, this is Amy." Stephen proudly stated. 

The woman smiled and awkwardly waved a little, my own smile feeling a bit too forced. 

"Right," Stephen started, clapping his hands together. "We have a few bits and pieces to do in the kitchen, and then Mum should be home from the shops. We're cooking you girls a good 'ol Roast." 

Stephen always made me laugh about how enthusiastic he was about the tiniest of things. I admired him for keeping his sense of humour while growing up.  
In a short amount of time, I was mixing some cake mix together. It was said that it was for a neighbour's birthday, but I'm not quite sure; words just kind of floated by my ears long enough for me to only listen once. Jessie was washing up and humming along to the radio, making jokes with her dad. They got along like a house on fire, and I even managed to laugh at one or two of the awful puns.

"So Amy, you've stolen my old room then?" Jessie suddenly asked, more like a statement than a question.

Nervously, I glanced over to her and slowed down the mixing. 

"I didn't really know it was your room…"

Jessie laughed, "Do what you like with it. It's the biggest compared to Hannah and Rachel's." 

I smiled a bit in response, turning my concentration back to the mixture in front of me. Stephen wandered into the living room while the silence carried on, my arms growing tired already.

"It's okay, y' know."

What?

"I know it's probably scary and out of your comfort zone, but it's okay." 

Here comes my big mouth. 

"You don't know, don't lie." 

Jessie was silent for a few moments, but then she turned to me and surprisingly spoke up again. 

"Okay, I don't know." She started while crossing her arms. I tried to pay attention, honest. "But I know that you're safe here and we're here if you need anything."

Her tone was gentle but still solid enough to make an impact.

Jessie shrugged as if it were nothing, "You don't have to do anything you don't want to." 

Then it was quiet. Jessie was clearing some things away into the cupboards, and I'm not sure where Stephen went. I was slowly stirring the mixture and staring at it when I heard her voice start up again. It already sounded familiar and homely. Is that possible? 

"I'm rehearsing for my tour tomorrow... I know it's a bit random, but Mum and Dad said you've been a bit bored. Do you want to come and watch?"

"I'm fine thanks." 

It almost automatically came from my mouth. I didn't even know if that's what I wanted. 

"Sure?" She asked again, raising her eyebrows a little and smiling. "You can come out shopping with me after if we have time." 

"Your parents have spent enough money on me already." 

The smile on her face dropped. I didn't know why... I just thought she was dramatic.

"Okay," she started, dropping the dishcloth to the side. "If you change your mind, just let Dad know."

"Okay."

I wanted this to stop. Right this minute, I didn't like it. Whatever that was. She looked irritated? Disappointed? I never would love meeting new people. 

"I'm going to my room. I'm tired."

I mumbled, awkwardly placing the bowl on the side before leaving the kitchen much to Jessie's protests. As much as I liked to be alone in my room, this time it felt different. It didn't feel like my room. I assumed it never would, but I wanted it to. Sad, isn't it? When you don't even feel at home in your own bedroom. Surprisingly I was left alone until the food was done, which I appreciated. I could never tell them that, though. That would be embarrassing. 

Dinner was okay, and I kept quiet. I think Rose and Stephen had grown used to it. During the first few days after I had come 'home', they tried to get me to talk more and overall get involved instead of just sitting there listening and not interacting. They tried, I guess. It didn't work. Why do you have to talk 24 hours a day to be considered okay? I couldn't help but think that they were disappointed. Shortly after dinner, Jessie had to leave to get home and prepare for tomorrow or something. The thought of actually accepting her invite for the following day crossed my mind, but only briefly. It wasn't until when I woke up the next day when for some reason I do not know of, I wanted to go. Or at least, I needed to get out of the house. Even if to just sit in another building all day and watch Jessie rehearse.

"Stephen?" I called out, just loud enough for him to hear over the kettle boiling in the kitchen. 

"Yeah?" 

Something in my throat blocked me from speaking anymore, my mouth opening and my body just freezing as the words swam in my head and I panicked. 

Stephen turned a little, "What's wrong?"

"Can I go watch Jessie rehearse?" I spat out quickly, shouting at myself for being so dramatic. 

I almost froze again when Stephen simply looked at me, pausing for a second looking… shocked? 

"Yeah… yeah, of course." He stuttered, placing the milk on the side. "Let me just get my coat on. I'll drive you."

Stephen called ahead to Jessie and let her know we were on our way, and luckily, it wasn't that far from the house. It was comfortable for once while driving, and we were there before I wanted it to end.

"Just ask Jessie to give us a call when you want to come home, and I'll pop in the car and pick you up," Stephen explained, pulling up outside a building with a massive black door in the middle of it. "Have a good time, yeah?"

"Yeah," I mumbled, smiling a little before opening the door and picking my bag up. 

"I'll see you later."

The car door was gently shut before it pulled away, leaving me to turn around to the stage door. I didn't even know where to go. Cautiously I made my way forward, pushing the door open after pulling my bag onto my back. I pretty much looked like Dora the Explorer, wandering around in a building who couldn't talk to people to save her life. 

"Hi, can I help you?" 

My head whipped around once I had heard the voice in the whitewash corridors to be greeted with a young-looking man, dressed in black with wires over his shoulders like headphones. 

"I'm… I'm here to see Jessie."

The young man smiled, "You must be Amy?" I nodded. "Come on, she's just in her dressing room going over a few things. This way."

Whoever he was, he was kind. I liked him. We trekked through the corridors until the white forest grew more prominent and louder as we drew nearer to wherever we were going. People were strolling around, talking through headsets or moving heavy containers with their bare hands. Everyone knew exactly what they were doing.

"I'm Lewis, by the way. I play the guitar for Jess." The man announced, turning and smiling to me again. That sounded pretty cool, if I was honest. "I'll make sure you have fun today, don't you worry."

After telling an awful joke to me and actually encouraging a laugh, we reached a white door with a laminated piece of paper on saying 'Jessie J'. Lewis knocked gently and pushed it open, allowing me to go first. Behind the door was a wide-open room filled with sofa's, a table full of every food you can think of, a TV, games, a ping pong table and whatever else you could want in one room. 

"Changed your mind, then?" the familiar voice asked, a scruffy looking woman in jogging bottoms appeared from another door. I wouldn't lie, she still looked beautiful. 

"Help yourself to food and whatever else you like." 

"Heads up!" 

Luckily, I turned to see the bottle of Sprite being thrown directly at me by some other guy aiming for Jessie and I caught it instead of it hitting me square in the face. 

"Nice catch." He mumbled, smiling and looking back to Jessie, who had her eyebrows raised. 

"I would prefer it if you didn't try to kill her before she even had a chance to enjoy her day." 

Other people were introduced to me over half an hour. Some were band members, and some were people there helping with whatever they could. They all seemed really friendly, but I just couldn't get to grips with any names. Except for Lewis. I knew who he was. 

"Just a heads up," Jessie started while we were walking to the stage area. "We're looking at getting like Nando's or something for lunch. Do you want some?" 

I nodded a little, "Yes, please." 

"Someone will come round before, and we'll all order it then."

It was silent for a few moments while we watched the stage being set up. Jessie's band were off tuning their instruments or testing their sound or something, so it was just us two. I couldn't  
help but feel a little bit awkward. 

"Thank you for coming." 

"What?" 

Jessie sat on one of the arena chairs, "Thank you. I didn't think you would."

I shrugged and sat beside her, still clutching to a bottle of water I had picked up. 

"Is everything okay?"

"I'm fine."

I saw her smile a little, "I'm not stupid. I know what 'I'm fine' means."

"I'm okay." I corrected, which made her smile again. 

"I know this isn't the time or place to talk, but if you do feel uncomfortable or something, head back to my dressing room. No one really goes in there unless we're on break." She explained. 

I began to wonder what she had been told about me. Was the whole family sat down in a dull, white room and warned that I was a nervous wreck half the time? Did they even know who I was?

I nodded in response, my knuckles almost white from clutching onto the bottle so tightly. I wasn't able to relax until Jessie was called onstage to sort some wires out which were attached to her; it all looked incredibly technical. Just then I let my mind wander, too. I had never actually been to a concert before. I would have liked to, but we can't always have what we want. The stage was how I expected it; huge. But it was much more professional looking. All the staff there were in black and had business-like faces on, looking as if they would yell at you for accidentally getting in their way. Obviously, I stayed put and didn't move through the whole thing. It was loud when the music started, and I don't even think that's as loud as it can get.  
Jessie sang a few songs, to check her microphone I guess, and then the instruments were tested. She made me laugh when she did little dances on the stage or made fun of the rest of the band. They would just do it back, too. They all looked comfortable together like a family. I would be lying if I said I wasn't jealous.

"Sorry, was that a bit loud for you?" I heard, snapping me out of my daydreaming which I should really stop. I shook my head a smiled a bit. "We're ordering lunch now, what would you like?

It was lunch, and I hadn't even noticed the time going so quick. A few minutes ago, I swear it was 9am. Then came the embarrassment following Jessie's previous question.

"I haven't had a Nando's before," I whispered out, tucking some of my hair behind my ear.

Jessie's occupied self with all of the packing away came to a halt, the inner ear things in her hands being held still as she simply looked at me with an unreadable expression. Shit.

"Sorry." I blurted out. The bottle was still clutched in my hands.

Jessie blinked a few times, "You've never had a Nando's? Ever?"

Shaking my head, I shuffled in my seat a little. 

"Do you like spicy food and chicken?" I nodded a bit. "I'll get you what I'm having. If you don't like it, you can steal someone else's."

"Okay." I simply replied, the feeling of guilt washing over me for no apparent reason. 

Jessie watched me for a few moments with what looked like a confused look on her face, the wires slowly being pulled from her clothing and some black box in her pocket. The microphone was placed on the side before she mumbled a slight 'come on' and I followed her back to the dressing room. Which, by now, was full to the brim of people. People who made me feel as if they were staring at me. The scrawny strange kid who Jessie brought along. I wouldn't have been surprised if they thought I was some 12-year old who had won a competition to hang with pop sensation Jessie J for a day. Jessie said a few words to Lewis who noted down who wanted what, some other man picking his phone up and dialling numbers. It felt as if the room just kept getting smaller as more and more people joined the crowd. In reality, it probably wasn't as many as I made it out to be.

Jessie had already busied herself with making more jokes with another new face. I don't know how she did it. She was just a natural at being in this surrounding. Whereas her little friend, aka me, felt as if her chest was closing in. I still hadn't moved from the door, so I slowly backed out into the white corridor again and viewed the party from the outside. I often felt like this, and felt more comfortable this way. It's like watching a party scene in a movie.

I found myself wandering around the corridors for what seemed like hours, but I think it had only been ten minutes. I was utterly lost, and every corner I turned revealed a new set of doors which weren't the one I was looking for. 

Eventually, I walked into the arena again, which was now empty and still. I turned back to look at the entrance I came from, and back to the stage in awe at how I managed to find it. Then, in awe at how huge it was. Without no one watching me, I was able to really take the surroundings in, and adjust to how small I was compared to the open space. My boots found their way up the side of the stage steps ready to explore. Some instruments were left as they were, others packed away. There was a set of a few keyboards in one corner, to which I wandered over and took in all the little buttons. I wonder what it would be like to be able to fluently play. As if it were a bird gliding through the air… you don't realise you're playing or flying until you actually think about it. My fingers danced lightly over the keys, pressing down on one and jumping at the sound of a note which filled the air. A wide smile overtook my face as I pressed down on another key, a lower sound this time which bellowed around me. The idea that something, someone, so small could make such a huge noise like that entertained me. 

When I was younger, I always wanted to play an instrument. Whether it be a clarinet, violin, the triangle for God's sake. Anything which made a noise, I wanted to learn it. But it never happened. And I don't want to talk about that. 

I did the same with the drums, except this time I sat on the little black seat and picked up a pair of sticks which had been battered and bruised. Lightly tapping each asset one by one and over and over genuinely excited me. It made no beat, no sense… but I was enjoying it.

I imagined what it would be like to be doing this exact thing in front of an audience, the arena full to the brim and overflowing with people. Of course, they wouldn't let that happen. Health and safety and all that. They actually calculate the amount of tickets to be able to sell by seeing how big the space is, and seeing how many square feet can fit into that space. Or something like that. Each audience member and their standing ticket is assigned to this little square which is theirs, but I wonder if they actually stick to that space? I've heard stories of audience members being sardines and some, who were most likely drunk or high or a combination of the two, who dance at the back where there's still so much room. I wonder what it's like to be at the very front, packed like pencils. Then, the opposite, where the whole area is yours at the back.

"I can get the guys to show you how to play if you like."

A voice froze my body, but the drum sticks fell from my hands and bounced around before settling on the hard floor. 

"What are you doing out here?"

I jumped up, knocking over the seat of the drum kit and making things worse. Everything echoed louder and louder with every knock, and all I was trying to do was to back away. 

Jessie's face emerged from the side of the stage, pausing when she noticed how startled I was.

"It's okay," she started, "I goof around on the kits all the time. They don't mind."

All that came from my mouth were the words which I had learnt to say all my life. 

"I'm so sorry I didn't mean to, I won't do it again."

Her confused face looked me up and down, and I couldn't make out what she was thinking. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't figure it out. 

"It's okay."

I was frozen, watching her slowly approach. The thudding in my chest spread across my body, and the heat in the room suddenly surrounded my cheeks. Even a few meters away, I flinched  
and stepped back when her arm reached out towards me. 

Her arm retreated.

One of the boys interrupted the atmosphere, and Jessie watched me for answers. I couldn't give her any. For the rest of the rehearsal, I sat up in one of the balconies, watching the people work below and picking at my Nando's. When the staff started to pack up, someone came and told me that Jessie was ready to leave and they'd drop us both home. I don't know if I wanted to go with them, but I didn't really have a choice.


End file.
